Question

We are not automatically born with a good sense of identity, self-esteem or, self-compassion. What do you feel accounts for the fact that some individuals are not self-compassionate? Can they, as adults, change the feelings they have towards themselves? What steps do you feel those individuals can take to become more self-compassionate?

Answer 1

Being self-compassionate means being kind, non-judgemental and encouraging to oneself when one faces difficult situations, failures and inadequacies. This means one shouldn’t criticise oneself harshly and harm oneself when one is not able to cope with life. Being compassionate would require one to realize that human beings are tend to make mistakes, struggle and have their own limitations. So, accepting failures and struggles as part of the human life would help on overcome guilty feeling and motivate oneself. Secondly, people need to learn to ask for help when facing difficulties by accepting the fact that one wouldn’t be able to face difficulties on one’s own. Thirdly, one needs to learn to develop positive thoughts that things would change for good. So, using self-fulfilling prophecies and self-talk would bring more positive motivation and would help one stay focused.

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